Guest jester

Jesters Corner

174 posts in this topic

Sorry, I was in an Optician's at the time... :)

There is of course NO reason, why you lot cannot send me your attempts... And I will Post them ( with your Names attached if you wish)...

Or you could post them yourselves... :?:

Please Note: The 'Groanometer' goes from -10 ( :( ) to 10 ( :) )...

Yours Jester :jester:

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HOW TO GET LEAVE

I urgently needed a few days off work, but I knew the Boss would not allow me to take a leave. I thought that maybe if I acted "CRAZY" then he would tell me to take a few days off.

So I hung upside down on the ceiling and made funny noises. My co-worker (who's blonde) asked me what I was doing?

I told her that I was pretending to be a light bulb so that the Boss would think I was "CRAZY" and give me a few days off.

A few minutes later the Boss came into the office and asked "What are you doing?" I told him I was a light bulb.

He said "You are clearly stressed out. Go home and recuperate for a couple of days".

I jumped down and walked out of the office. When my co-worker (the blonde) followed me, the Boss asked her "And where do you think you're going?"

she said, "I'm going home too, I can't work in the dark!"

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I thought people were supposed to be cheered up with jokes :?:

hee hee, I do like the humor.

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Yeah, it was funny, in a groany sense! ;)

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OK, Several points:

  1. That was a Great Big Groanometer 6 :)

  2. I bet you thought I wouldn't notice you moving this Topic, It took me 10 secs to find it... :)
  3. I shall have my Revenge... :)

    Yours Jester :jester:

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Yeah, it was funny, in a groany sense! ;)

Thought some of the jokes were jester bit funny! ::groan:: I liked the one about time off work though. :)

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I thought people were supposed to be cheered up with jokes :?: hee hee, I do like the humor.

Here's one for Wirralbagpuss!

Mrs Cutout looks up from the TV during her favourite Jeremy Kyle show on hearing muffled noises coming from the dining room

Meeeeeooowww....bump

Meeeeeooowww....bump

Meeeeeooowww....bump

Later, her husband comes back into the room, sits down to watch the telly, all without saying a word.

Mrs Cutout raises a questioning eyebrow to him.

"Well? What was that all about?"

After a few seconds the reply came:

"You're right Dear, there isn't enough room in there to swing a cat!"

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Definitely a 7 ( -1 for Animal Cruelty) making a 6 on the groanometer... :) :)

Yours Jester :jester:

PS: It gives me a WARM glo, to see you all joining in... lets keep up the good work...

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Q1 How can you tell if a blonde's been using the computer?

A: There's Tippex on the screen.

Q2: How can you tell if another blonde's been using the computer?

A: There's writing on the Tippex.

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Patient: "Doc, I can't stop singing 'The Green, Green Grass of Home'"

Doctor: "That sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome."

Patient: "Is it common?"

Doctor: "Well, 'It's Not Unusual'"

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